Love is such an interesting concept, and actually one that has evolved over time. Centuries ago, young men and women were getting married when they were just teenagers, and although some were cases of arranged marriages for political or financial reasons, a lot of times these young couples felt that they were madly in love with each other.
these young couples realistically only knew each other for a few weeks or
months, sometimes even just a few days, and today’s society realizes that this “love”
that they were referring to was simply “lust” for the other person sexually.
And while there is nothing wrong with lusting for another human being, there is
a big distinction between lust and love.
how can you really tell if you are in love with the person? Well, with that
backdrop in mind, we can start by saying that you know you love someone if your
relationship isn’t totally dependent on sex and lust itself. So often, new
couples are addicted to making out and sex, and everything that comes with
being physically attracted to the person. This is the clearly signs of lust,
even though it is masked under the guise of being in a relationship.
at some point the sexual activity should naturally slow down as you begin to
connect with your partner on a more emotional level. This means going out on
dates that don’t necessarily end in sex, or simply talking to each other
without any overtly sexual undertones all the time. When this begins to happen,
then there are at least concrete signs that you are not simply lusting for the person,
but have actual romantic and loving feelings for them.
said all that though, that doesn’t necessarily constitute love yet either,
although it is very close. What really constitutes love is when you
unconditionally love them. I guess said another way, there is no such thing as
love other than unconditional love. This means that you should love your partner
despite his or her flaws (of which we all have many if we are being honest). He
or she may be a bit overweight, or have daddy issues, or have mental health
problems, but none of that make you love her any less.
yes, there is nothing wrong with trying to fix your partner of said issues, but
only to the extent of wanting to make them better people. Even if they can’t
change, you will still love them just the same.
while you may very well “feel” like you love someone on the surface, even after
getting past all of the lust and the sexual beginning to your relationship,
until you really get to know them and see their flaws, as well as see them at
their low points in life, you will not truly know if you love them. But if you
can look past all of those “problems” and love your partner just the same, then
rest assured that you are truly in love.